Wednesday, 9 February 2011

Listography - Top 5 things I would like for Valentines Day.

                                        A bit drunk and sunburned during the Edinburgh Festival...

This weeks Listography focuses on the all important Hallmark event of Valentines Day. So here is where I reveal that like myself, Oh Daddy is a bit of grumpy git sometimes. I knew that when I signed up years ago that Valentines Day was never going to be an extravaganza. He is your typical Scottish man. However amidst the mumbling and swearing that the occasion produces he always manages to surprise me with something. Don't feel sorry for me if you have one of these partners/husbands who constantly showers you with trinkets and love tokens as this is the way I like it. I have a friend whose husband leaves her poems in her handbag and this kind of stuff makes me gag! If were to receive a poem from HRH I'd imagine it would go something like this:

Roses are red

Violets are blue
Sugar is sweet
And so are you

But the roses are wilting
The violets are dead
The sugar bowl's empty
And so is your head

We figured out years ago that Oh Daddy is one of those guys who does put a lot of thought into the presents that he buys me but he buys lots of little things, in the hope that one will hit the nail of the head. This ritual is very expensive and so I usually tell him what to buy me beforehand or email him some suggestions. He decided ages ago that we were going out for dinner to a new restaurant to mark the event. The truth is I don't really care about Valentines Day at all and have everything that I want and need but I certainly won't knock back any attempts on his part to woo me all over again.

So for the Listography this week I shall list my impossible Valentines wishes:

1) A lie in. Not just letting me sleep for an hour before unleashing the kids on me. A proper lie in where you all vacate the premises so there is no noise. A proper lie where you send in a make-up artist and pastry chef so I can wake up looking refreshed and well rested and I get to wake up to the smell of freshly baked pastries.

2) To watch a film. I'd like to be able to watch a film without being interrupted by children or falling asleep after the opening credits!

3) A cape. No, not because I have some raging desire to become a superhero but a fabulous cape designed by a local seamstress. There is an amazing design collective operating from a shop in Tollcross and they stock beautiful designs. As well as being a bit on the dear side, I am completely the wrong shape for one. However, if I were 6 feet tall, lithe and a brunette here's how I would look:

4) All over plastic surgery. Everything lifted, tucked and nipped please. I may be beautiful on the inside but I'm a bit droopy on the outside!

5) A removal firm. With 10 days until we get the new place I'm starting to freak out a little...


  1. God what is it with men and lie ins - they give you an hour in bed and then expect breakfast and the rest of the day off! Grrr.

  2. yes, plastic surgery. I never thought of that one! x

  3. @Kate: Exactly! And they act like they're doing you the BIGGEST favour in the world! xx

  4. @JoJo: I very much doubt that you're in need of any... xxx

  5. @JoJo: I very much doubt that you're in need of any... xxx


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