Friday, 17 June 2011

Women are never disarmed by compliments; men always are ~Oscar Wilde, An Ideal Husband, 1899

In the run up to Father's Day, I've been thinking a lot about Oh Daddy's relationship with both of the kids.



If you have read my About Me section you'll know that only Miss B is his biological child. We have been together now for nearly eight years and during that time I've watching him grow to love A over the years, despite it being hard for him to understand him sometimes. OD expected A to behave like a normal little boy and found it hard to comprehend why he didn't as we all did at times. When A was younger he was so focused on his latest obsessions that he wouldn't branch out to experience other activities. All attempts at playing football, building things failed as A sat for hours and lined up his green plastic toy soldiers. Even now as the pressure of the end of term, a PROM!!, and high school looming, A is starting repeat these behaviours, wiping the dust off of his old wresting figures and spending hour after hour lining them up. It's hard to parent a child who spends a large part of the day in his own world. He has done exceptionally well though. They share a special bond and as individuals they are both quite black and white thinkers so they gel well. Not always but often.


OD joined our family after coming out of the army and despite his former training and lifestyle copes well with our disorganisation and chaos (most by smoking in the back garden!). With B he is different and I never really expected this not to happen. OD is pretty old school and shows A affection is very manly ways; a pat on the back, a punch on the arm, a knowing nod. While he loves them both equally he is more demonstrative with his little girl, chasing her for cuddles, stealing kisses and being more at ease physically with her. A is nearing that awkward teen stage where they shrug off the attention of their parents, develop shockingly poor posture and grow their fringes long so they can skulk around. It's funny to watch the both of the kids in their development as B becomes more affectionate and A becomes less. I often walk past the playroom and catch glimpses of A giving B squeezy cuddles, as we call them. Our family is quirky and we work together. Personally I opt out of me time for us time as I enjoy it more. I don't feel the need to break away, nor do I need breathing space. We have crafted our family and there is nothing more precious nor as exciting out there in comparison.

So this post if to celebrate the man in my life in lieu of Father's Day. A time for me to reflect on and share some of his little quirks, habits and his big face.


#1: Oh Daddy believes that everything can be healed with Germolene. Just like Gus Portokalos from My Big Fat Greek Wedding puts Windex (glass cleaner!) on everything he wanders around with a tube of Germolene. If I complain that I have a spot or the kids gets a graze, he's there to administer the magical cream. If I fail to take up an offer of being Germolene-ed, then I am repeatedly told that I "should have put some Germolene on it!"


#2: Oh Daddy picks his toenails and as a consequence has very tiny toenails. An utterly disgusting habit that I have to hoover up constantly. A has since picked up this habit and gets shouted at (by Oh Daddy) for doing this. This is a bad habit that he brought from his army days where he tells me he used to pick his toenails with a knife (I think I'm supposed to think he's a badass because of this). 


#3: Oh Daddy likes to cuddle. Despite his knife totting nail picking habits he does have a softer side to him. He likes nothing more than to cuddle up at night when the kids are in bed and tell me about his day or to watch a movie together as part of our us time. His favourite position and the position that I fall asleep most evenings in, is sitting up with my head in his lap. Oh Daddy also likes to squeeze out a fart or two whilst my head is in his lap. They do not escape, they are squeezed. His apologies are of little comfort. 


#4: Oh Daddy is super organised. He is so anally retentive and I am not, nor is A and it drives him a little bit mad. I have systems and hate to see clutter and he piles things up everywhere which to him is his version of being tidy. I throw things back in the cupboard and don't really care where it goes as long as it's hidden. I often put CDs back in the wrong box which induces a tutting fit from him afterwards as he struggles to find the appropriate box. It really winds him up ad so I have on occasion did this to wind him up as he scuttles behind me making things all nice and neat. Saying this it never actually occurs to him to clean after he has tidied things away...



So here's to our Oh Daddy!

We love him so much. xx

2 comments:

  1. the germolene thing came from granny...i am the same though you dont get germolene over here so we are all just broken...the pink stuff was the best!
    A2

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  2. Really? He never tells me things like that!

    Had an eczema break out last night so currently smelling of the pink stuff! I should send some over.

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